Stoicism as emotional preparation for inevitable hardship | Ramblin' & Amblin' | Oct 26, 2026
Ramblin' & Amblin' Field Notes with Mike Hall (Staff Software Engineer)
Recorded on the move: engineering observations, systems architecture, and software craftsmanship reflections.
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Spoken Overview:
"Stoics are funny. I, uh, I too, um, I, in Boy Scouts in the 80s released, I remember in the Boy Scout handbook there was a, um, chapter on the Spartans and the, oh, not a chapter, it was a blurb and they showed them, ooh, that was..."
Recorded: October 26, 2026
The Interviewer
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
Stoics are funny. I, uh, I too, um, I, in Boy Scouts in the
80s released, I remember in the Boy Scout handbook there
was a, um, chapter on the Spartans and the, oh, not a
chapter, it was a blurb and they showed them, ooh, that was
great. Uh, they showed a boy, you know, in a little tunic and, um,
you know, told us about the Spartans and how they, uh, you
know, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, they lived a rugged
lifestyle, they knew how to camp, so I think it was trying
to get us to think of ourselves as modern Spartans. And I want to say that there was a mention of Stoicism in
there at some point, um, so, that became kind of a, the
first time I really applied a philosophy, mindset,
perspective, um, to my, uh, outlook on the world.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
And, uh, the reason that's relevant here is that I went
through a pretty bleak period and one of the things that I
turned to to help me deal with it was, um, not much of a
release of minutes. And that, you know, put me on a, uh, on a path to
discovering, whoa! Uh, uh, a path to discovering, uh, other philosophies and
spark. And, uh, that's, the spark was so much more complicated
when you really...
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
I am, like, again, I'm not one of those people that's read
all of the, uh, deep literature. I am an armchair fan of philosophy, and I use it to think
about my own existence, and I try to take what I can get,
even if it's, um, a pop understanding, but I'm peeling back
, um, the curtains, the layers on that. But it still is, uh, I, I embrace that this will always be
not as deep as I want it to be. But the Stoics, I think they've been largely misunderstood
as being an attempt to just feel no emotions, and I couldn
't be further from the truth.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
Marcus Aurelius reminding himself that today he will meet
all kinds of people who are going to try his patience. But it was an acknowledgement in private to himself that
his patience is going to be tried. He did not have feelings. Um, I think it was, was it Seneca?
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
I think, I don't remember the, um, I, I, I, as I can't, I'm
, correct me, I'll, I'll have to look this up later, but, uh
, the one that, um, was a slave, and then he became an or
ator, and there was one point where his leg was broken by
his master, and he didn't cry out. I can, uh, again, I, I, I'm gonna admit I haven't read the
story, but I can imagine that, it's like, uh, I've been
through periods where somebody's kicking the shit out of me
, metaphorically or literally. And I don't say anything, I laugh, um, because I'm not
gonna give him the satisfaction of, uh, of me winding up
and punching him back, um, if I can, but sometimes just
taking it was enough. Um, I've had guns pointed at me, I've been kicked while I'm
down, I've been punched, I've been bitten.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
I've been in fights, I've been in a lot of crazy things,
but, um, the thing I, I struggle the most with is my own
emotions. Sometimes there's a path that's a little bit too treacher
ous, and people down there I don't want to go deal with, um,
and I'm sure they would like to just have a nice
conversation as well. I'll just say this for another time, maybe when I have my
kids out here and do it together. But, uh, the, um, you don't have to tackle every obstacle
the first time you see it, save something for tomorrow.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
And that's something I've struggled with my whole life. So, stoicism was kind of the first introduction to, like, a
, a, a, a named philosophy for me. And, and Spock was really, before I even knew what stoicism
was, you know, I mean, yeah, as a kid I saw it in the scout
book, but I didn't really understand. Um, but much like Marcus Aurelius, Spock had to deal with
his own internal emotions and, um, the divide between the
purely rational, which even the Vulcans were not purely
rational.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
They tried really hard, though. But, sometimes that, um, holding on to, um, non-emotions
means that sometimes you're spending more time thinking
about not having the emotion than in actually dealing with
a problem. And, um, when, whatever, it was sitting in the car, it was
just a row, whoever, I, again, largely self-taught, late,
that's why I hate the word autodidact, because I'm not. I'm just somebody who is kind of curious about this stuff.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
Um, in, um, in that if he cried out when his leg was being
broken, it wouldn't have done anything except maybe embo
lden or anger the person doing it. Because, uh, as somebody who has had violence done to them,
like, people stronger and bigger, the, um, call, but the
begging and pleading or, or, or any of that is, um, or
showing emotion, um, just makes it worse. So, in that case, it was the right emotion, it was applying
the right emotion at the right level, and being able to
have control over that, and, and getting ahead of, of, what
you're feeling, and what you're going through, and how
unfair it is, or how powerless you are, and just accepting
it. So, I don't think it's so much as the, um, abdication of,
of, of, of, uh, emotion.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
It is the right emotion at the right time, and acceptance
of that which you do not have any control over, and that
the only thing you have control over is not giving them the
satisfaction of hearing you say, ow. Um, and that's Spock, you know, he could get stuck in, in
predicaments where he was, uh, more worried about not
having emotions, and Kirk would be like, come on, come on! And, uh, and, uh, and, uh, the development of the character
was, I, I don't think it was that he showed emotion, per se
, it's that he was at peace. Um, God, I love Spock.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
And, uh, Nimoy was great. And he struggled with, with the character as well. He felt it was silly, it was stupid. He hated being associated with it, and then he learned to
love it.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
Which, uh, which I think is such a perfect balance. That, uh, that he even grew with his very character he was
portraying. I know it seems like I'm lost, but I'm actually making it
out of my mind here. Um, I think I'm going to go back up this way.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
It's just, I didn't want to go all the way back to the
trail. I kind of wanted to keep proceeding on this path. Maybe I will go down this hill here. But, uh, no, no, no, I'm not going down that.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
Um, I'd like to stop recording. But, uh, yeah, Stoicism is something that I think a lot of
pop, um, philosophers grabbed onto
because it just said, don't feel anything. Cut out all emotions. And that's not what they said.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
That is not what the, that's not what they were saying. And that other philosophers in other cultures, sometimes
even before them, you know, in terms
of Chinese and, um, and Eastern, uh, traditions, or
contemporary, or even earlier, and they were
talking about acceptance. And I think that's really what Stoicism was about. It's about accepting things and allowing yourself to align
with the appropriate emotion for
every moment.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
Because I guarantee you that Marcus Aurelius, when he went
into battle and he was facing down
his opponents, he wasn't like, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, uh,
I mean, it was too serious. No, he screamed, he bled, his men died. I'm sure he cried. He would find a time and place to do that.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
Because he did love people. And he talks about it in his minutes. And he chairs people. That is an emotion.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
And people think that because he talked about imagining a
child die, um, as a father, um, I can
say that I've had to contemplate this. This is like, kids go to, uh, bus trip, to, uh, to museum,
bus flips, something happens. That's it. That's it.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
Now what? It's, uh, it's not that I'm hoping for it. It's, uh, not that the very thought of it breaks me, but it
, in a, in a way, um, it prepares
you for things that can happen that you have no control
over. I can try to keep my kids locked inside my house all day.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
Mosquitoes. I can try to keep my kids locked. Hey, heck, my son, one time, he got bit by a tick playing,
um, outside our, our house. Happened to be in some, uh, tall grass.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
It was just off, um, acting as kind of like a little, uh,
flower barrier for a building. And a tick got him. He was, I don't know, eight, nine, ten, something in that
range. That's that, with him in the, uh, in the, uh, hospital.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
And they even took a picture of the, uh, um, the, uh, the
bullseye from the, um, oh my
God, what's that called again? The, um, oh, it's that, um, the tick bite, uh, disease. I can't remember what it's called right now. I'm just out here walking through a field trying to think,
but he had a big, um, whatever.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
It was real dangerous. But the, uh, the thing was, is that they were able to give
him the, the medicine. I, I got him to the, to the hospital in time. They were able to treat him, um, uh, and give him the
appropriate medications.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
And since then, he is now 15, going on 16. And he is a healthy, developing young man. Uh, taller than me. Handsome than me.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
Smarter than me. Clever than me. Kinder than me. Smarter than me.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
Um, more charming than me. Cooler than me. In every metric. But he hasn't had my experiences.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
And that's my choice. And even then, I've had to stop from letting them leak onto
him too. And that's been part of the growth. But, um, but, uh, with him, he got, he had the virus.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
And, you know, there could have been a case where he could
have been debilitated. Died. And, uh, I had to just sit with that. And, as they say, I had to sit with the idea that my son,
and before that, my youngest, she was in a NICU when she
was born.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
Uh, she had a little bit of, uh, pneumonia when she was, uh
, born. And, uh, having to see all of these other children in the
EU, fortunately, we were only in there like three or four
weeks. I can't remember the exact duration. I, I, I'm a mapper, not a packer.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
Uh, the, uh, I remember driving in the snowstorms back and
forth. I faced the death of my parents. I've had to face death quite a bit in my life. And, um, you know, that's, I'm aware that's something you
just have to prepare for because it's inevitable.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
Just like all of us, there's not a single person that don't
have, doesn't have to do this. And that's why I think stoicism is, resonates with so many
people, but it's a little bit simplistic in the modern
distillation. But, uh, being able to sit there and think through horrors
beyond comprehension, um, is necessary so that when
something should happen, you can be prepared for it. And, um, the worst thing is, really what it is, is thinking
about the worst thing.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
And, uh, you know, people say, oh, you know, what's the
worst thing that could happen? Yes. We all die. The end.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
You know, that's not the worst thing that can happen,
though. There's worse things than that. Um, but will you be able to handle it when you're there? And I would fight so hard against things that I wanted to
control, and I would then become anxious because of
thinking about stoicism, how I'm not being stoic.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
But as I learned more about it, and really thought about it
, I realized that it is just about having the right emotion
at the right time. And that we go through these exercises to prepare ourselves
mentally, like, kind of like katas, where we're working
through the worst case scenarios. So we can emotionally prepare ourselves, and then hopefully
whatever does happen isn't that. So, at the very least, you, uh, over-estimated and under-
delivered, um, in the best possible way.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
So anyway, uh, stoicism. For me, for the... Going from being a... A absence of emotion, to applying the right emotion for the
right circumstance, and preparing yourself for inevitable.
Mike Hall
Host, Ramblin' & Amblin'
▶ Speaking
So that way you always have a framework of emotional
preparedness. I wish I could apply to my patience with people quite as
well as I am trying to, but, uh, I just quite haven't
cracked that nut yet. But, uh, it's a work in progress. Alright, anyway, alright, thanks, bye.